You Most Likely Experienced This Yourself, Especially in the Sports Industry

By: Alana Meraz and Olivia Puttin

Have you ever felt like you aren’t doing enough? Or like you haven’t succeeded? I’ve found myself in this situation many times during my career. This is a common occurrence for recent college graduates. Those who don’t have a post college job lined up but also those that landed a job or GA position that they don’t feel they deserve. There is a term for this feeling, imposter syndrome. 

“Impostor syndrome is a psychological pattern in which one doubts one's accomplishments and has a persistent internalized fear of being exposed as a "fraud".” 

This is our social media creator, Alana’s experience. 

It was my sophomore year, I had just landed my first sports related internship with Phoenix Rising FC. I was on cloud nine, the team had just re-branded and were ready to take the state by storm. I had been involved with the Sports Business Association at ASU. I had attended a few meetings and was familiar with their members. One of them was a freshman named Alice*. She had already gotten a leadership position and landed an internship with the local MLB, which at the time was where I wanted to end up and a goal I was working towards. Seeing her accomplish all this before me, I felt maybe I wasn’t doing enough and that I wouldn’t end up working in sports like I had imagined. This feeling sat with me for some time until I landed my part- time job on the street team with the Arizona Diamondbacks. At that point I felt worthy and that I was taking a step in the right direction. But this same sensation of not belonging escalated during my time in grad school in Barcelona - I was in a program with all men and most were lawyers. I felt like I didn’t belong and had no place to be there, even though I did. I had filled out the same application, taken the same tests, and passed them all. But when I looked around the room, I felt like I didn’t belong.

It dramatically affected my performance in class and my experience overall. But at the same time I knew I was there to better myself and learn more about the sports world. Fast forward to now, I find myself feeling like I’m not enough. Granted I think part of it stems from the current climate of the industry with COVID. Part of it also comes from a place of seeing someone who is younger than you already being 3 steps ahead. But I always remind myself of what one of the Phoenix Rising staff told me: “Everyone is on their own path and there is a good chance someone wishes they were in your shoes. You have to take every opportunity you get and make the most of it.” I also often find myself second guessing my presence on social media. I feel that I shouldn’t give my opinion on something because I don’t know enough or haven't done enough. But the thing is I have, maybe I don’t have that full time job yet but I have my own experiences that make me unique. At the end of the day, I am working on becoming the best version of myself and a badass woman in sports. 

Like we said in the beginning, this is something that many people in the sports industry struggle with. Here is our co-host, Olivia’s experience. 

Three years ago, during my sophomore year of college, I set a goal for myself: to earn and accept a graduate assistant position at a school within a Power Five Conference. Would you believe I accomplished just that? For the next two years, I will be calling the University of Georgia home. It’s hilarious to me that even though I bleed Maroon and Gold, I will be sporting Red and Black, (Minnesota fans will get it). 

Although I make this feat sound easy, it was a rocky, difficult path. One filled with doubts, fear and anxiety. I still deal with these emotions today on a daily basis. For some reason, I’ve never thought I was good enough. There is someone who is always better than I am (to a certain extent that is true..) But, maybe to fill you in, I should start from the beginning. 

My love for athletic communication started my freshman year of college at the end of the scorer’s table at the University of Minnesota, Crookston. I was the official stat keeper and assisted the Sports Information Director for three years.to add onto this, I was also a member of the women’s soccer team, FCA (Fellowship of Christian Athletes) and SAAC (Student-Athlete Advisory Committee). All of this combined made me extremely motivated to achieve my dreams. Then, the summer of my junior year and opportunity fell into my lap; an internship in the Athletic Communications Office at the University of Minnesota. 

I knew once I got this chance, I had to take it. I would be working for my favorite college team doing what I love. But, it was not easy. For a long time, I felt as though I was competing with the other interns in the office. I felt like I was never good enough, I always compared my work to theirs and thought they were so much better than me. I would constantly judge my work and think “how did I even get this internship? I’m not talented enough to be here.” I really thought everything I had done up to that point to earn my position wasn’t enough (or even real). I felt like I was a fraud. 

It didn’t help either that I was once again starting over in a new place with people who are extremely talented at what they do. You see, in these situations I shut down and close myself off from others. I become introverted and lose confidence in myself. 

However, I knew I needed to push myself to learn new things and become better at what I wanted to pursue a career in. I signed up for more events, asked more questions and tried to get to know as many people in the office. More importantly, I asked for help. The SIDs, interns, and social media coordinators that work in the University of Minnesota Athletic Communications Office are the best in the business and whenever I needed help, they were always there to help me. These things helped me gain my confidence back and made me realize that I shouldn’t compare myself to others constantly. We are all on our own path and we all experience different things. 

Even though I still deal with imposter syndrome (and probably always will) I always remind myself that I worked really hard to get to where I am. Everything I have up to this point I have earned by myself. And yes, there are always going to be people who are better than me, but I only use that as motivation to work harder and be a better SID, a better person, and a better Olivia. 
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We wanted to share our experiences with those in the industry to know they’re not alone and to remind you that you are a badass man or woman in sports!